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skorpy
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PostSubject: very concerned   Tue Apr 10, 2007 12:37 am

Ok ladies and gents,please give me your views to this....

As you know I have a new home which we have now lived in for 7 weeks.For the past 6 weeks we have had to endure a 4 year old screaming blue murder next door and banging like nobody's buisness at all hour of the night 2 to 3 times each night,every night.The mother has apologised face to face and with letters saying she is very sorry,and that she went too london for 2 weeks and now cant get her back into a routine..and I have told my husband I felt sorry for her.Well now after weeks and weeks of listening too her,I was sat in my bathroom lastnight where I could hear the little one saying..no mummy stop!! I dont know if it was that the mother had enough of her screaming and was making her get back into bed or she was abusing her in some way and the thought terrifies me too the extent that lastnight I was very close too calling social services.

But obviously I can not throw accusations without knowing the facts and so today I need too have a word with the lady living the other side of them and ask her,her thoughts on the whole thing as she has lived here longer.I mean the thought of the little one being hurt and we are just next dorr and not doing anything really upsets me.I speak too the mum and a few weeks back she told me she is on medication for schizophrenia and obviously it worries me more.She seems fine,although trys too be very clicky towards me which alarms me a little. I cant seem to go anywhere without her jumping on me saying hello etc..maybe its just her friendly nature...but I am so worried about the little girl who is called Amber.And I dread to wait for the next lot of screams tonight...The girl may just have some sort of problem and the mother says she has spoke too health visitor/doctor etc and they say she just needs to get into a routine.

what are your thoughts?

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PostSubject: Re: very concerned   Tue Apr 10, 2007 1:42 am

Ooo now this is a hard one. I don't really know what I would do to be honest I don't know if going to the the next door neighbour and asking them about your neighbour just incase it gets back to them and it turns nasty.

I would write down everything you hear, times whats been said etc and then i'd ring social services and voice your concern.

But saying that I don't know if I could do that to be honest just incase its like she has said she can't get her back into the routine but 2 weeks surely thats long enough???

Hopefully someone will have a better thought than me lol xx

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PostSubject: Re: very concerned   Tue Apr 10, 2007 1:47 am

Hmm i'd play investigator here. Keep an eye out for anything that may seem odd. I know that for a 4 yr old to be up until 10 pm banging is strange in its self anyway! Then to be getting up and banging at 1am? What could she possibly be doing? Maybe the girl telling her Mum to stop was because she was getting smacked for being naughty or something? But then again you never know.

I would play it by ear for sure. If you really think that you should call Social services then do it, at the end of the day who knows whats going on in there. A little kiddie could be in danger and it goes without saying how you would feel if you left it and god forbid that something dreadful happens.
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PostSubject: Re: very concerned   Tue Apr 10, 2007 5:52 am

hey hun

i have a similar thing going on next door to me ... heard shouting from dad and the lad crying and screaming ..... and one night the police turned up .... it is scary

i have been writing down what i hear and keeping a note of times ect as this is what i would do at work with observations and that.... for child protection.

i would say if your concerns worsen ...then is no reason at all why you shouldnt ring social services ... if the mother in question is diagnosed for schizophrenia they will pobably be aware of her anyway, but sometimes they need to know and need the observations of neighbours, friends etc .. to investigate as they can not be there 24/7.

keep a record hun, and if you feel your corcerns are real then contact social services and they can investigate ...... and then at least you know you have helped Thumbup

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PostSubject: Re: very concerned   Wed Apr 11, 2007 2:04 am

I spoke to the lady on the other side of my next door neighbour and she told me she is at her wits end with it all.And enough is enough.I was stood in her house while the little girl (Amber) was kicking off again and they have too put up with as much noise as us....Too my amazment the woman living across the road told us she can hear her too.

Apprently social services and health visitor is visitng today and I will be voicing my opinion on it all. The little girl was liturally banging and screaming from 8.30pm untill 3.20am this morning.We had 2 hours sleep and what annoys me is my hubby has too drive and I am worried he will fall asleep at the wheel.

Amber should in all honesty be taken away as the mother is on tablets and we are sure they knock her out at night and she doesn't hear half of the noise her daughter is making..and if her pills do this ,then My honest opinion is she is unfit too look after a 4 and 2 year old...she also has two other children 10 and 8,but they dont live with her,they live with their dad.I will let you know what happens next

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PostSubject: Re: very concerned   Wed Apr 11, 2007 2:36 am

OMG how scary, and to be a new neighbour must be hard not to know what to do as you don't want to get anyones backs up.

Think you did right by going to the other neighbour..at least they are in the same situation.

Hopefully social services will resolve the problem...and I hope that Amber is not being hurt...it's unbearable to think about what can go on behind closed doors.
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PostSubject: Re: very concerned   Wed Apr 11, 2007 11:56 am

OMG!! how awful. what did social Services and the HV's say?

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PostSubject: Re: very concerned   Wed Apr 11, 2007 12:19 pm

The conclusion too the story is....

Health visitor says too mum "Hold her hand when taking her too bed,and read her bedtime stories...Hold the door shut if she starts firing up untill she calms down"

WHAT THE HELL!!!!

she is talking out of her backside...Jen (Mother) even taped her daughter in full swing and let the health visitor hear it and still all she says is,she needs to get into a routine..

Ill give her routine...The stupid woman hasn't had non existent sleep for 7 weeks because of it..thats right,this has been going on for 7 weeks.I will phone the health visitor myself and give her a peice of my mind.

Amber has started banging already as I am typing this..no doubt till the early hours on and off. Steph who lives on the other side of Jen and Amber is not amused either and doig the same as me...if we get no joy we will involve social services,and Jen knows of all this and is fine about it.

She does disipline her daughter with smacks if she dont behave,but it is not enough as she obviously has a behavoural problem.Apparently she punches everything and the plaster board walls have dents in them.I am sooo depressed.

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PostSubject: Re: very concerned   Thu Apr 12, 2007 1:14 am

WTF! Doesn't she realise that your neighbour is trying to have a routine for her???

The thing that springs to mind is the TV programe with Dr Tarnya Bryon where she helps parents with their kids I can't think for the life of me what its called though lol

I don't know really what else to suggest as your doing everything you can.

Only thing I can think of is earplugs - i'm not being funny here btw I have to use them when Dave is home as he snores!!

Good Luck hun and I hope it doesn't last much longer xxx

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PostSubject: Re: very concerned   Thu Apr 12, 2007 1:35 am

sophies_mummy wrote:

The thing that springs to mind is the TV programe with Dr Tarnya Bryon where she helps parents with their kids I can't think for the life of me what its called though lol

I was thinking the exact same thing...She would be a great candidate for that programme.

Nothing happened lastnight btw.We had a full night sleep,well almost..My daughter woke me at 2am because she needed her eyes wiped,she has conjunctivitus.But it was bliss.

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PostSubject: Re: very concerned   Thu Apr 12, 2007 3:25 am

Glad you got some sleep! At least the Mother is trying and its not abuse. Sounds like they were pretty unhelpful for her.
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PostSubject: Re: very concerned   Thu Apr 12, 2007 3:28 am

uksammy wrote:
Glad you got some sleep! At least the Mother is trying and its not abuse. Sounds like they were pretty unhelpful for her.

She admitted she did lose it with her that night and hit her more then she should have..so really it is abuse and would have been a social services job.But I am taking it into consideration the reason behind it and the mother not getting any rest etc because of the bad behaviour of her Daughter..something I will overlook this time,but obviously if it continiues,she will need professional help as she may go too far next time.

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PostSubject: Re: very concerned   Thu Apr 12, 2007 5:18 am

wow, sounds like a job for Super Nanny!

Kids like that can really send their parents into turmoil. My nephew is the same, she's had some help from HVs etc, and he has calmed down a bit now. Its a shame because this HV sounds like she cant be bothered, but then again, it may just take a few simple things like giving her a bed time story and ignoring her when she throws tantarums. Super Nanny has helped some really distressed kids with simple things. One of the main problems is attention, and kids not getting enough of it.

Hope things work out asap for them both.
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PostSubject: Re: very concerned   Thu Apr 12, 2007 9:16 am

oh oh oh

send me in lol!

im a qualified nanny ...... i wanna try my hand at being super !! :cheer2:

xxHxx
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PostSubject: Re: very concerned   Thu Apr 12, 2007 9:24 am

~xHannahx~ wrote:
oh oh oh

send me in lol!

im a qualified nanny ...... i wanna try my hand at being super !! :cheer2:

xxHxx

hahaha can us here at BabyTalk make you a Super Nanny cossie? lol!
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PostSubject: Re: very concerned   Thu Apr 12, 2007 9:27 am

yes yes you may Clap

Super Hannah to the recuse ...du du dhhhhhhhhh lol!
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PostSubject: Re: very concerned   Fri Apr 13, 2007 2:13 am

How was it last night Skorpy?

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PostSubject: Re: very concerned   Mon Apr 16, 2007 3:32 pm

Something of the sort is hard to figure your way out of the situation because you dont want to throw accusations but you also dont want to well wait until it is too late!
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PostSubject: Re: very concerned   Mon Apr 16, 2007 3:52 pm

sophies_mummy wrote:
How was it last night Skorpy?

Well for the past 4 nights,it has been great.Jen,the mother moved her into the front bedroom which was th little girls request.She obviously did not like the bigger room and felt too open. Apparently she asks to go too bed now and within half an hour is alseep.She has calmed down alot.

Now Kai is waking me up at 5am every morning with teething ,LOL..oh well we cant have it all.

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PostSubject: Re: very concerned   Tue Apr 17, 2007 5:16 am

lol typical babies!

Well at least that one problem sorted or now. Thankgod or that, you might be able to get a decent nights sleep soon!!
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PostSubject: Re: very concerned   Tue Apr 17, 2007 8:15 am

I am glad that the little girl next door is doing better. So how many teeth does the little one have?
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PostSubject: Re: very concerned   Thu Apr 19, 2007 3:33 am

Oh i am so pleased to hear the little girl next door is doing better and you are getting some sleep, as i was reading the posts here i was also scared that the girl was being abused but i am pleased it was not that and things have got better...xxx
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